VIETNAM CHRONICLES

CAPTAIN RICHARD L. KLOPPENBURG

SHORT STORIES FROM 1966-1967 IN VIETNAM

BELOW ARE SOME TRUE BUT UNTOLD STORIES
VIETNAM WAS THE GREAT ADVENTURE OF MY GENERATION

Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs - BAO LOC

In the mess hall at the Bao Loc MACV compound, we hired Vietnamese waitresses to serve the meals. The girls came from the local village and did not understand English. We had to teach them English. Which we did. Along with teaching English, we taught the waitresses English swearwords. If we were upset about something, we would use the word snow white. If we were really upset we would use the words snow-white ane the seven dwarfs! If these words were used, the girls would blush, and run away.

One day we decided to have something different to eat? How about banana cream pie? We had banana trees in the compound and we could buy eggs at the local market. Thus banana cream pie was born. We had banana cream pie every Tuesday for lunch. If we had people from another area for lunch, they could not believe banana cream pie in a war zone?

On Sunday we would barbecue in the back yard of the compound. Usually, we had a water buffalo. They would buy the meat at the local market. I remember going to the market. You would see all the meat hanging from the ceiling. The procedure was to cut off a chunk and take it back to the compound. Sometimes it would be my duty to go to the Tan Rai special forces and pick up a case of steaks. The special forces could get anything they wanted. So we made a deal with them. Order an extra case of steaks on their next order.

In the mess hall we opened a bar. We charged for the drinks---$.15 a drink. The method of payment was to make a mark on a piece of paper. The paper was on the wall over the bar. The system was 1111 and then a slash for 5 drinks. The bar was so profitable that the income paid for all of the food.

The special forces had a limited number of weapons. They were used for the Montayards. When I found the weapons, I decided to try a few out. I flew with a Thompson submachine gun, then a shotgun with double ot buck, then a M1 carbine with a fold up stock. The foldup stock was used by paratroopers during WW11. I liked this best because I could slide it under the seat of the airplane. I could not bring the M1 home, but I did bring the fold up stock and two banana clips. I still have them both.
Sometime in 1966, we had a visitor stay overnight. He wanted to check out the war for himself. It was Johnny Bench. We all gave him credit for coming to Vietnam, especially the Macv at Bao Loc.

In Vietnam it seemed that to be able to communicate, we had to use swear words. I got really bad. When a person had 30 days or less to stay in Vietnam, we would say 29 days and wake up, 28 days and a wake-up, etc. So, beginning with 30 days we would encourage these short-timers to sit at the “couth” table. At that table, you could not swear. The purpose was to clean up your language before coming home!